Looking Outward Together

couple
Love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction. Antoine de Saint-Exupery

I’ve read this quote several times as I’ve been completing my marriage book, a beautiful thought from the author who gave us The Little Prince. I love the idea of it — gazing off together toward a common goal. But suddenly today, it hit me anew. You see, I’ve been writing that we cannot look to each other to be the Savior in our lives. Early in marriage, when things are new and beautiful, we do look to the other to meet our needs — why else did we marry them? Over time, as things begin to fall apart, we blame them for not meeting our needs! But both views are flawed to begin with.

Only God’s revelation shows us we were never meant to gaze at our spouses to provide the good or prevent the bad. Only our true Savior can do that. He provides the good as a gift and He allows the bad to push us to Him. Our spouse never could save us. But to look together at our Savior — ah, there’s something that will sustain for a long, long time!

4 thoughts on “Looking Outward Together

  1. I met my husband when I was 15, my dad had abandoned us when I was 14. I was looking to my now husband as savior to replace the father figure in my life and to save me from a bad situation. In our early 30’s I finally got it together and we both look toward the Savior together. I believe if I hadn’t turned it around, we wouldn’t be together today. Coming up on 20 years in January!

  2. I’m so thankful God sustained my marriage by HIS power long enough for me to learn this truth (not to look to Scott for my fulfillment, but for us to both look toward Christ for our individual and together fulfillment). I am blessed to have a husband who loves me, loves God and looks toward HIM. Taking the pressure off of each other to make each other happy has allowed us to find joy and reflect joy more fully.

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