Church Treatment of Gays: NOT the Way of Jesus


“A friend I’d had over for dinner just the night before wrote back questioning my faith.”

Kari expressed her heart with me in this letter and, with her permission, I just had to share it with you.

Love. Love. Love.

I began following your blog a few months ago when your husband started posting it on Facebook, and it has become a real blessing for me (as well as a breath of fresh air!) God began to stir in my heart regarding the LGBTQ community several years ago, and as I watched the reactions of the evangelical community to this “issue,” my heart sank time and time again. Surely, this can’t be the way of Jesus, I told myself. As a writer for a very conservative Christian publisher, I have had to “lay low” on what I truly believe in my heart, because, sadly, I could lose my job.

But in reaching out, in finding other communities of faith, in stepping out of the church I held onto for so long, I have found something beautiful and freeing. There is another path, and I believe this is the narrow path Jesus talked about in the Bible. This is the path to true life, one in which we simply keep our eyes on him and don’t worry about what the world says. As a lifelong people pleaser, it has been difficult for me to step up and speak up, knowing the naysayers are waiting like sharks to snap back in a moment.

Just last week, I posted what I considered a very gracious article regarding the World Vision debacle, and a friend I’d had over for dinner JUST the night before wrote back questioning my “faith.” I was saddened that this woman, whom I’d let in my home, fed and loved, who has known me and my character for 15 years, would question my “faith.”

But you know what? In the end, we only have an audience of one. God. 

I must remember this when the questions come, when the naysayers say “love the sinner, hate the sin” but then conclude that “love” really isn’t enough.

Keep on doing what you are doing. Your voice is needed and wanted!


Matthew 22:37-40… Jesus replied, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. The second most important is similar: ‘Love your neighbor as much as you love yourself.’ All the other commandments and all the demands of the prophets stem from these two laws and are fulfilled if you obey them. Keep only these and you will find that you are obeying all the others.”

Love. Love. Love.

9 thoughts on “Church Treatment of Gays: NOT the Way of Jesus

  1. I’ve heard “love the sinner, hate the sin” so much from my MENTOR in the church I went to for seven years! She was supposed to love me and mentor me, but she told me that her sister was gay and was proud of the fact that their mother would not let her sister’s partner in the house at all. After I left the church, I e-mailed her and told her that I was so happy and was with the love of my life and do you know what she wrote back? That God did not care if I was happy, he just wanted me to serve him! Complete with scripture verses!

  2. Nice letter… I am sure most of us have friends questioning our faith… how sad… but they questioned the faith of Jesus so we are in good company!

  3. God bless Kari. Enrich her life and love her deeply as she continues to step out in faith. Kari i love you and your heart … As a lesbian I would like to say thank you for caring deeply enough to be uncomfortable with the status quo and leaning in to what God as in store.

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