Dear Susan: Doesn’t God Tell Us To Judge Each Other?


Are we supposed to judge each other?  Doesn’t God tell us to do that?

Another “hot button” topic for today’s “Dear Susan” – let’s do it.  : )

I write these every Friday. Sometimes they will be poignant, sometimes thought-provoking, sometimes tender, sometimes funny… but hopefully always worth the read.  🙂

Dear Susan,

With all love and respect I will be telling you this. You are portraying Jesus as a God of love. As a matter of fact He is, however that is only one side of the coin. He is also a righteous judge and on Judgement day He will judge the people not on their perception of what they think its best but on what’s written on the Word of God. And there are examples of correct from brother or sister to another. Coming to terms that we are in sin is a huge task and can only be achieved if we totally surrender to the will of God. What God calls sin, it is sin and therefore no man can alter. Doesn’t God tell us to judge each other?

Willing to Judge

Dear Willing,

I appreciate your heart here. You are right that it is difficult indeed to see our own blindspots. And indeed Jesus does invite us to speak into our brother and sister’s lives, but he includes the gigantic caveat that we must remove the great big log in our own eye before we can see clearly to remove the speck from someone else’s. He is saying that we have so much more in our own lives to deal with than in others’ that we need to slow down quite a bit before attempting such fine detailed work.

Have you ever been outside a store with doorbuster sales on Black Friday? People have literally been trampled to death as shoppers pour in through the doors to get the doorbusters. To open the door to speaking into each others lives feels to me like opening the store on Black Friday: it is to invite a stampede of correction by people who have no business doing it, who are too eager to do it, who do not do it in love, and by people who won’t take no for an answer. Pointing out the possibility of someone being in a physically dangerous place is not the same as holding doggedly to the position that someone is in sin, and if they don’t change they will experience consequences.

You summed up your idea by saying that this huge task of coming to term with our sin is achieved only if we totally surrender to the will of God. Well, if someone is resisting God, why would they listen to you or me? God knows how to reach them far better than we do, and if they are resisting God, then maybe we should let God be the one to reach them perfectly and wonderfully. On the other hand, if they are not resisting God, but we are sure they are, then we stand to be as wrong as Job’s friends who wouldn’t let it go, and instead of being a comfort to him in his tragic situation, they became a menace to him, adding misery to his already difficult time.

If we tell someone their same-sex relationship is wrong, and God is not telling them that, then we stand to become a menace as well, adding misery to their already difficult time.

Sorting out the right or wrong is much more subject to error than simply loving as we are called to do, and trusting God with the rest.



15 thoughts on “Dear Susan: Doesn’t God Tell Us To Judge Each Other?

  1. Love what you usual, Also my understanding of church corrections was that if leadership in the church was in open sin, like the pastor in an affair with a choir member, that the Elders or Deacons could speak to that issue, not the congregation pointing fingers at each other, which they don’t except for LGBT people.

  2. Love your response, Susan! Excellent!

    I’d like to add that judgement seldom stays inside the Church. When we decide that something is sin or someone is sinning, that judgement usually pours outside the church and WE have determined who is sinning and what their outcome will be if they don’t repent, in the way that WE deem necessary.

    Secondly, I’d like to add that those who feel the need to judge, control and condemn others have a very small view of God. If He is really God, is He not able to reach individuals where they are and as they are? As you mentioned, if those individuals are not open to God, we certainly can’t change their hearts. If they are, God’s got it. He doesn’t need us to tell people what’s wrong with them; He needs us to show them unconditional love and grace.

    Our judgements of others are often more based in our fears of God’s wrath than our knowledge of His love and faithfulness.


  3. I can’t believe she signed it “willing to judge”. smh. The main problem with these people is that they are idolators, worshipping the Bible instead of God. They are the ones in serious trouble, yet think they are “telling” someone else.

  4. I had a minister basically say the same thing to me the other day.

    He said, marriage is constitutional. That for LGBTQ to be married in the church or by ordained ministers is to ask for God’s blessing on the marriage. (There are eight different kinds of marriage in the Bible!!)
    He said, that is between the couples and God.

    He said, “Some churches can’t leave it alone. People are born this way, and if they are honestly seeking Christ, who are we to judge?” He said, ” Basically Jesus told people, follow me, I am the way, but MOST IMPORTANT, you are to Love God and Love others,” that’s it, then Jesus walked away and left well enough alone. He did not FORCE himself, his teachings or commandments on any one. How ever, he left the doors open for those to come to him on their own, for them to work it out, and build the relationship.

    He also added that the Bible has been interpreted so many times by man, and that the interpretations have changed over time “due to” “the passing of time”. There are many things in the Bible that we no longer follow, in the year 2014, they are considered barbaric. He recommends a teaching OF the “History of the Bible” and the years and the times in which things happened, it really is eye opening. 🙂 🙂

    His view is that a lot of Christians go to church on their worship days, listen to the general teachings and messages and do not truly understand their own salvation and the Grace, Mercy and Love offered by God.

    He is now retired. 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

      • Amen. God is working for sure!!!!!!!! Look at all the work he has done through YOU!!!! 🙂

        This past year, I too have grown spiritually. I have studied more about the “History Of The Bible,” and it REALLY is very interesting, I can’t get enough. I have even thought of Seminary School…..:) 🙂 sigh.
        My days of reading and research have consumed almost all of my time, but what an education!!!!
        I have had many conversations with clergy,and their words are different then what some friends and other Christians have said.

        My take;
        SOME people are too nonchalant about their religion, they know the Bible verses coming and going, they are in church year round, but they do not really,deeply, understand/comprehend it’s content, IT’S ENTIRE CONTENT and what Jesus CALLS us TO DO.

        How ever, there is always hope, prayer, and God will meet them if they are honest seekers.

        Come final exam time, I hope I do well. 🙂

        But, it is God’s job to grade.

        Keep praying, and be specific in your prayers!!!!!


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