What Happens When They Come For You?

What happens when the church or society decides that something in your life is now a "particularly evil sin?" What happens when they come for you? We have been evangelicals for 24 years -- last weekend we visited an open and affirming church in Austin. I was struck by the immediate kindness, compassion and intimacy … Continue reading What Happens When They Come For You?

Stop “Acting Like a Christian”

"I wasn't allowed to go to the fair," he told me, "because I had become a Christian. My mother said, 'Christians don't go to the fair.' But since my brother Bill was not a Christian, he was allowed to go." What? This was Jim's explanation -- after I'd shared my faith with him -- of … Continue reading Stop “Acting Like a Christian”

When Do You Learn God’s Grace?

"Thank God I'm an alcoholic -- because otherwise I wouldn't have known grace!" JP We dislike trials. We hate difficulties or roadblocks or obstacles. We want nothing insurmountable because we want to be strong enough to surmount anything. After all, we like to feel good about ourselves, and we like to know that whatever happens, … Continue reading When Do You Learn God’s Grace?

Answers You’ve Been Asking For

Beloveds, we have faced so much in these volatile days. My heart goes out to Christians torn by their compassion for the LGBTQ and their sense of duty to uphold their moral standard. I continue to pray for God's revelation to everyone on every side of this issue. I am always moved by Jesus' answers … Continue reading Answers You’ve Been Asking For

So This is How Rejection Feels

I had a big argument with someone very close to me today, a mentor. Someone I love very much. She was angry at me for my blog, saying I am being unfair to Christians who are kind and loving, that it goes both ways, that we hear only stories of Christians' anger toward LGBTQ instead … Continue reading So This is How Rejection Feels

What if Straight was Gay and Gay was Straight?

Bullying is devastating. If you have experienced it, you know what I mean. Sixth grade was hell for me, as I was singled out for abuse, ridicule, and pain. I honestly did not know how I drew this hatred, but I knew I would never be at ease among these kids from River Oaks in … Continue reading What if Straight was Gay and Gay was Straight?

A Tale of Two Trees: Why We Are All Asking the Wrong Question

The Gay Christian debate rages on, with what seems like more interpersonal casualties every day. How in the world can we find common ground in such a deeply personal and sharply divisive issue? I think we've been asking the wrong question. We've been focused on the rightness or wrongness of being gay, instead of: whose … Continue reading A Tale of Two Trees: Why We Are All Asking the Wrong Question

Christians, Why Are You Afraid of Gay Marriage?

A group of prominent evangelicals recently declared that if marriage equality becomes law, they will disobey it. These God-fearing meticulous Bible-followers feel so strongly about gay marriage that they are willing to flout this law they don't agree with. I really, truly understand their commitment about something that goes against their deeply held principles. I … Continue reading Christians, Why Are You Afraid of Gay Marriage?

The Condemnation of DOMA

"Christians are becoming increasingly irrelevant. They are dragging Jesus down with them." The eyes of the nation are on the Supreme Court as we wait for a ruling on the Defense of Marriage Act and Prop 8. What is at stake for Christians in this battle? Does our stance even matter now that it's in … Continue reading The Condemnation of DOMA

A Love Letter to the LGBTQ from a Christian Mom

“They kicked me out on my 18th birthday for being gay… I’ve tried to contact them… I don’t know if they still love me.” Jonathan Allen, America’s Got Talent My husband and I sat stunned as this young man sang Pavarotti on “America’s Got Talent.” Tears filled our eyes as his story settled on us, … Continue reading A Love Letter to the LGBTQ from a Christian Mom

Why Hoping for Change Can Hurt

“People have been badly wounded by the false hope that if they would just pray, study, and counsel, then change can occur. But it doesn’t.” True Story is the theme of next week’s Exodus conference in CA. I’m holding out hope that this will mean less theory and more lived experience, the only thing for … Continue reading Why Hoping for Change Can Hurt

To Christian Parents of Gay Children

You want to shove those words back in and put the lid on. But you can't. Your child is gay. This goes against everything you've been taught. It was not what you had in mind, and you instantly wonder where you went wrong. When you become a parent, you know to expect the unexpected. But … Continue reading To Christian Parents of Gay Children

Who Ya Gonna Call? Sinbusters!

My desire is to pull us beyond the question of "sin and no sin" and to the place of "now what?" What if someone you love tells you he or she is gay or lesbian? Where do you go with that? I've been writing on viewing this through a different lens, opening the possibility that … Continue reading Who Ya Gonna Call? Sinbusters!

A Tribute to Brennan Manning

“To live by grace means to acknowledge my whole life story, the light side and the dark. In admitting my shadow side I learn who I am and what God's grace means.” Brennan Manning What I know about Brennan Manning is he knew (experienced, lived, trusted) the love of God. He lived in his position … Continue reading A Tribute to Brennan Manning

Born Selfish

We've been talking about whether or not people are born gay. The other morning I woke up full of conviction of how selfish I am. I had dreamed that a close friend ended our friendship because of my blog. Suddenly everything felt very tender and close to the surface. As I began to read John … Continue reading Born Selfish

Now that I’ve Come Out of the Closet

  I recently came out as a straight, married, Christ-following mother-of-five, in support of the LGBTQ community. Since then, I've received quite a few emails and comments -- many incredibly encouraging and some less-than-loving. I understand that views on this issue are deeply rooted, and people don't want to make the wrong move. I took … Continue reading Now that I’ve Come Out of the Closet

Born that Way? – Part 2

90% of gay men interviewed said they were born gay and have never been attracted to women. They have no experience of having chosen it any more than straight people chose to be straight, and they are told in no uncertain terms that it is sin.That's my haircutter's situation. I asked when he knew he … Continue reading Born that Way? – Part 2